


Two Pining Idiots (And A Lesbian) In A Hot Air Balloon

by booksandchocolatecake



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Homoerotic Table Tennis, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Nightmares, Romantic Comedy, Underage Drinking, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, cuddling for warmth, they’re playing with balls :)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:41:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29514075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/booksandchocolatecake/pseuds/booksandchocolatecake
Summary: Zuko and Sokka got Mai out of the Boiling Rock, but, thanks to Sokka, Zuko is beginning to suspect he doesn’t like girls. When they decide to go back for Ty Lee and Suki, Zuko isn’t ready to come out, so Mai agrees to pretend to keep dating him.Can Sokka and Zuko survive their unbearable sexual tension, a questionably safe hot air balloon, and Mai’s nightly emo slam poetry readings?Or: big gay field trip!
Relationships: Mai & Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Suki & Ty Lee (Avatar)
Comments: 30
Kudos: 149





	1. Zuko Has A Realisation

**Author's Note:**

> Don’t worry about the sexual tension in the blurb, it’s only heavily hinted and there’s nothing explicit in this fic, the author is a minor herself and does not sexualise minors.

Zuko had never hated the Avatar. Not really. He’d hated what the boy represented - the unyielding search that Zuko had been thrown into, the endless loop of despair his life had become, and then the concept of his honour, just out of reach, forever evading him.

Still, it was hard to believe that he was watching Aang and his friends play table tennis half-naked.

Zuko thought Aang had been the one to take off his shirt first, although at this point everything was a blur. The sun was blindingly bright and shone light onto every crack and crevice in the open-spaced Air Temple. Even Zuko, who had been raised in the Fire Nation, could barely withstand the burning heat.

Sokka pulled off his blue t-shirt and yelled “Catch!” before throwing it to Katara. She wrinkled her nose at the sweat-soaked shirt and threw it to the ground. Sokka stuck out his tongue at her, and Zuko saw her mutter “Boys.” under her breath and roll her eyes.

Sokka had invented table tennis this morning, a week after waking them all up at 2am after the idea came to him of tennis. As far as Zuko could tell, it was exactly the same as tennis, but smaller. Oh, and there was a table now.

There wasn’t much to do whilst waiting for Aang to be trained by Zuko in firebending.

Sokka hit the tiny ball towards Aang, and he brought his bat forward a second too late. The ball sped past him, Sokka began to raise his arms in victory, and, on reflex, Aang airbent the ball towards Sokka.

Sokka let out a great cheer. He pointed an accusing finger at Aang, grinning.

“Disqualified!”

Aang turned to Katara pleadingly. He pouted. “Please?”

Katara shrugged. “The rules said no bending. No take backs, Aang. Sokka wins.”

Sokka ran up to Katara and threw his arms around her. Zuko couldn’t help but stare at the muscles on his bare chest, sweat glinting off his toned stomach. Zuko felt his cheeks heat, then forced himself to look away. What was he doing?

“I love you, sis!”

Katara sighed and pushed Sokka away. “If you really love me, don’t cover me in your stinky sweat next time.”

Zuko found himself smiling from the crumbling wall he was leaning against, arms crossed, at the familiar antics of his... Who were these people to him? Were they his friends? Allies? People-who-he-wasn’t-trying-to-kill-anymore? If Zuko from a year ago could see him now, he’d throw a fit.

Sokka turned to Aang. “One more game?”

Aang wiped his shiny forehead with the sleeve of his orange robe. “Sorry, Sokka. I’m all out of energy! I’m gonna go find Toph and the buckets of ice Katara made earlier.”

Sokka looked at Katara for a second before she shook her head and followed Aang out of the room, and his enthusiastic gaze landed on Zuko. 

“Zuko!” shouted Sokka, despite the fact Zuko was right beside him. “Come play table tennis with me!”

“I’m not playing your game.” said Zuko.

Sokka groaned. “Think of it as training! You know, like Aang. Keeping those big muscles of yours healthy.”

Zuko wished he didn’t feel his stomach churn at Sokka’s comment on his physical features. He was about to refuse again, but Sokka put a hand on his arm, and pulled him towards the centre of the room, and Zuko found all he could do was follow blindly.

Sokka handed Zuko a bat and got into a steady stance on the opposite side of the makeshift wooden table. He stared at Zuko in waiting for him to make the first move. His face and chest gleamed. Zuko felt his red robes sticking to his skin, and the sun shining down with its sticky, oppressive heat. Something in the hot air felt hallucinatory, and dangerous. It put Zuko on edge, made him reckless.

“You know the rules, right?” asked Sokka. “Basically, it’s the same as tennis, but there’s a table. That’s why it’s called table tennis!”

“That’s really original of you.” said Zuko.

“I know!”

Sokka bounced the ball on the table and hit it to Zuko. He automatically returned it. They rallied without the ball touching the table for what felt like hours, relying purely on instincts. Zuko’s palms grew sweaty, his arms aching and his breathing laboured, but he didn’t let his concentration slip. 

It was when the sun reached its peak position in the sky at midday that things went wrong for Zuko. The heat was somehow the worst it had been all day, and the others were surely already indulging in Katara’s fruit-ice pops. His stomach rumbled, and he briefly paused to wonder who was making dinner today (he really hoped it wasn’t Toph, after the Great Cabbage Incident they didn’t speak about) and he reacted moments too late after Sokka hit the ball. 

He tried to throw his bat in front of the moving ball, but he had been too slow. Zuko chased it as it hurtled through the air. He didn’t notice until he was already mid-stride that Sokka had put his foot in front of Zuko, and he tripped, headfirst, onto the rock floor of the temple. Zuko hissed as his chin scraped the rough cobblestones.

The ball continued to roll past Zuko and Sokka, towards the great drop into the canyon below. Sokka screamed in protest and ran towards it as it slowly got further away. Still filled with rage at Sokka’s unfair tactics, Zuko summoned a small sphere of fire in his hand and flung it at the tiny white ball. It went up in a burst of majestic orange flames, and left only a sad pile of charcoal.

“Nooooooo!” exclaimed Sokka. “Ball!” Sokka knelt beside the ash and cupped it in his hands, tears filling his eyes. “You were a great ball.” he whispered. “Your sacrifice will be remembered.”

Zuko was bemused by his emotional response. Were inanimate objects treated with such reverence in the Water Tribe? Was this some sort of sacred tradition? Agni, had Zuko committed an unforgivable atrocity in Sokka’s eyes by destroying it?

“Isn’t it…” stammered Zuko, still laying in an awkward position on the boiling stone floor, “Just a ball?”

“Oh, no!” said Sokka. “Didn’t you know? In the Water Tribe, we worship balls like Spirits. Ball is a God to me!”

Zuko’s eyes widened in horror, and Sokka burst into uncontrollable laughter.

“Dude-” he managed to choke out, a hand on his heaving chest. “Dude, I was kidding! The look on your face…”

Zuko let out a relieved breath, and was immediately overwhelmed by embarrassment. He wished he’d been taught more about the Water Tribe by his childhood tutors.

Sokka looked at Zuko, who was a sorry, sweaty heap of robes and limbs on the floor, and must have felt guilty, because he held out his hand in an offering of peace. Zuko took it, but instead of getting up, he pulled Sokka down with him.

Zuko looked up into Sokka’s blue eyes. The other boy had landed directly on top of Zuko, their flushed faces so close they nearly touched. 

Zuko gulped and forced a shaky smile. “That’s what you get for cheating.” 

Sokka didn’t immediately respond. Zuko could feel the rise and fall of his chest, hear his heavy breathing from hours of non-stop exercise. He seemed to be staring intently at Zuko, his lips parted slightly. In the moments while Zuko waited for someone to move first, a lock of his brown hair came free from his ponytail and hung in front of his eyes. Zuko had the strange and sudden urge to tuck it behind Sokka’s ear.

Sokka laughed awkwardly, and Zuko blinked, suddenly aware of how close he was to Sokka. The way Zuko could feel the tension in Sokka’s muscled arms as they gripped his shoulder, how their lips had so little space between them. 

“Yeah…” breathed Sokka. His cheeks flushed. “That’s just… uh… yeah.”

Sokka rolled onto his back and silently lay beside Zuko on the floor of the temple. His stomach churned at the absurdity of what had just happened. 

Zuko wasn’t supposed to be feeling this way. It wasn’t natural. There was no logical explanation for why he’d started seeing Sokka so differently since they returned from the Boiling Rock with Mai. 

Mai. He had a girlfriend, and judging by the way Sokka talked about Suki, he did too. Admittedly, Zuko’s upbringing was sheltered, but he’d never been told by his teachers that it was possible for men to like other men like that. Were his feelings real? Was he simply kidding himself? Could… could the last few minutes mean that Sokka felt that way too? 

As Zuko had an internal gay awakening/mental breakdown/clung to the last shreds of his nonexistent heterosexuality, Sokka edged slightly closer.

“You doing ok, buddy?”

Zuko gave a nonsensical grunt.

“I’d be happy to concede, you know. I mean, I know it was unfair I tripped you but I was gonna win anyways, so I thought ‘why not?’ and you also burned my ball which was totally not fair or in the rules, and now I need to get Toph to make another one, but if losing really hits you this hard I can-” Sokka stopped rambling when he saw Zuko wasn’t responding. “Uh, Zuko?”

“I- Uh-” stuttered Zuko. “I think I need to go.”

Sokka gave an over exaggerated sigh and pulled Zuko close beside him. Like, really, really close. Soon, thought Zuko, his heart was going to give out from the stress of the last fifteen minutes.

“I hope you feel better soon! We can play more table tennis later.” Sokka pointed an accusing finger at Zuko. “Just don’t you dare give whatever illness you’ve got to Aang. Just because he’s the Avatar doesn’t mean he’s immune to… whatever weird bug firebenders get in the summer.”

Zuko swallowed, every nerve in his body focused on where Sokka’s arm lay on his chest. “... Yeah. I’ll try that.”

At that moment, Zuko heard a terrifyingly familiar deadpan voice from above him. 

“Woah. Zuko having fun. I’m shocked.”

Zuko scrambled away from Sokka and onto his feet. Standing right in front of Zuko, looking at the scene with no visible emotion on her face, was Mai. Zuko’s breath caught in his throat and his entire face flamed.

Without saying a word, Zuko turned and ran.

***

The rest of the day passed in a blur of nothingness. Zuko did any chore he could to distract himself from what had happened, and tried his best to avoid the inevitable confrontation with Mai or Sokka.

It worked, until he was woken late at night by movement, and saw Mai and Sokka packing their bags onto Appa.


	2. Zuko Does Another Life-Changing Field Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko confronts Mai and Sokka, and Ty Lee and Suki meet in prison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Choking and references to abuse in the second part of this chapter.

Over the last few years, Zuko’s life had taken many unexpected turns. From being exiled to working at a tea shop in Ba Sing Se to becoming a traitor to his nation and joining the Avatar, he was no stranger to change. 

However, he did have to admit that his girlfriend and the boy he was secretly crushing on running away together in the middle of the night definitely took the cake.

Zuko rubbed his eyes, convinced he was hallucinating, but alas, Sokka was slinging his boomerang over his shoulder whilst helping Mai onto Appa. It was dark, but not so dark that Zuko was unable to recognise Sokka’s slim frame and Mai’s usual slumped posture.

Zuko threw off his blanket and stormed up to the two figures. When Sokka saw him, he froze. Mai looked vaguely annoyed and glanced at Sokka.

“What in the name of the Spirits are you doing?” snapped Zuko.

“I was- uh-” Sokka gulped and looked around wildly for any excuse. “We were testing out Appa! You know, to make sure he’s not… rusty.”

Mai rolled her eyes. “You’re an idiot.” She looked directly at Zuko. “We’re going to the Boiling Rock.”

“You’re what?”

“I said,” repeated Mai, “That we’re going to-”

“I know what you said!” exclaimed Zuko. Orange sparks flew from his hands, and Mai and Sokka backed away cautiously. Zuko closed his eyes, as if calming himself, and when he opened them again, he let out a scream of fury. The flames in the nearby torches lighting the camp crackled and swayed.

“O- okay...” stammered Sokka, his eyes wide. “Let’s all just take a deep breath, we can calm down-”

“I am not going to calm down until you and all of your things are off Appa.”

“Shhh!” hissed Sokka through his teeth. “You’re going to wake the others!”

Zuko raised an eyebrow. “I thought we’d established that I don’t care about you and Mai’s ‘secrecy’.”

Reluctantly, Sokka picked up his abundance of bags and jumped off Appa’s back. Mai followed his lead, only taking one small black case. The floor of the temple was uneven and Sokka stumbled as he landed. Right now, Zuko thought, he deserved it.

“I caught you last time.” said Zuko. “I don’t know why you thought this would be any different.”

Sokka threw his hands up. “I don’t know! I didn’t ask you any suspicious questions this time, and I had Mai, who’s, like, the queen of sneaking around! I’m not even sure how you found us in the first place.”

“I’m a light sleeper.” muttered Zuko. There was a note of sadness in his words.

Zuko couldn’t believe Sokka could be so selfish. So reckless. He’d come to expect that from Mai, whose part in this plan he didn’t even understand, but Sokka had always put the needs of his sister and Aang before his own. Zuko knew Suki was in the Boiling Rock but… Love trumped all common sense for Sokka, he supposed.

“Tell me why.” said Zuko. “Why you decided to do something as stupid as stealing the Avatar’s one form of escape, and going to the most guarded prison in the Fire Nation, which we barely made it out of three days ago?”

“It was so much fun I wanted to do it again?” tried Sokka, in a poor attempt at humour. Zuko’s expression didn’t change. “I’m sorry, Zuko, okay? But I can’t leave Suki in that place. I know she can defend herself, but the Kyoshi Warriors need her.”

Zuko clenched his fists. “And you spent so much time thinking about the incredible, beautiful Suki, that you didn’t stop to think about Aang? But it doesn’t matter, I guess, because everyone loves Suki so much!”

An awkward silence filled the air. Mai coughed, and Sokka and Zuko looked at her. She didn’t say anything.

“Um.” said Sokka. “I think just because I care about Suki doesn’t mean I don’t care about Aang.”

“Not like that! I meant-” Zuko took a deep breath. “What if Azula attacked? Or any of the other hundreds of people who are after you? You and Mai would be miles away, with no way to find us again, and Aang would be unable to escape because you made the genius decision to take Appa!”

Sokka went still. He was a picture of guilt. “I… I guess I didn’t think about that.”

“You know,” spat Zuko. “I’d expect you to care more about any friend, Sokka. But it’s especially stupid if the friend you’re abandoning is the fucking Avatar.” 

Sokka’s face fell. Zuko winced. He stepped forward, and put a hand on the other boy’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry we didn’t get Suki back. I know that must have been hard for you. But you can’t sacrifice the safety of everyone for one girl. Whatever you planned, and however you roped Mai into it, it’s over.”

Mai rolled her eyes, and finally spoke. 

“It was my idea.” said Mai. 

Zuko froze. What? Mai couldn’t be saying what he thought she was… Could she? Why would she want to go back to that place? The same prison she’d nearly been locked in? She had to be lying to cover for Sokka, though Zuko was unable to think of a single reason she’d do that. She’d only ever shown affection to Ty Lee and Azula, and even then, it had seemed forced. 

“Didn’t you hear me?” Mai crossed her arms. “It doesn’t matter if Sokka’s too chicken to come. I’m going to rescue Ty Lee, and you’re not going to stop me, Zuko.”

Ty Lee? Mai was doing all this for Ty Lee? The same perky, annoying Ty Lee who flirted with every boy she met, and wore pink and ribbons, and was the exact type of girl that Mai would hate?

Sokka stepped closer to Mai. “Then I’m coming too.”

Zuko had to stop himself from screaming curses into the night sky. This was a trainwreck. A disaster. They were so close to the arrival of Sozin’s comet, and Aang needed weeks more of training, and now they were going to force Zuko to… 

“I’m coming.”

“What?” exclaimed Sokka. “I thought-”

“We’re not taking Appa. I’ve been fixing the hot air balloon we took from the Boiling Rock. It’s still faulty, and we’ll need to stop in a town every day, but if the weather is good enough... we can get there in four days.”

Sokka grinned widely and hugged Zuko, who simply stood in shock. “It’s gonna be great!”

Zuko sighed. “I’m only doing this because I don’t want you guys to die.”

***

When Toph woke up five hours later and Katara read her the note Sokka left, she laughed.

“They’re gonna leave Mai in some random Earth Kingdom village and fuck.”

“That’s my brother!” shouted Katara in horror.

Toph shrugged. “They’re still gonna fuck.”

***

Ty Lee closed her eyes, and she could almost pretend. She could taste Mai, feel the other girl’s lips on her own, Mai’s hands on her thighs, her tongue in her throat. For a second, Ty Lee imagined she was there again, kissing Mai, and she couldn’t remember anything but the feel of her face as it pressed against Mai’s and-

“You!” said a female voice.

Ty Lee opened her eyes, and the memory - the fantasy - was nothing more than smoke on the wind. 

She wasn’t in her pink acrobat top, but a loose-hanging prison shirt. Her black hair had been taken out of its usual braid and hung loose to her knees. She was on a bench in the crowded yard, and she had no idea how she’d ever thought it could be the beautiful room in Azula’s tank where she’d kissed Mai.

“Hey!” shouted the voice. “Look at me!”

Ty Lee looked up. In front of her was Suki, and she didn’t look happy. She was barely recognisable out of her Kyoshi Warrior makeup, and Ty Lee wouldn’t have realised who she was if she, Mai and Azula hadn’t stopped her escaping a few days ago. A lot had changed since then.

“It’s you!” spat Suki. “You attacked my girls! You tried to kill me! You’re the reason I’m in here!”

Ty Lee’s eyes widened in concern. “I was only following Azula’s orders! I have nothing personally against you, I promise, you seem like a really nice-”

Suki grabbed the collar of Ty Lee’s shirt and slammed her against the wall. The first thing Azula had done (after staring angrily at the space where Zuko had been for ten minutes) was put Ty Lee in handcuffs so she was unable to chi-block. All Ty Lee could do as Suki wrapped her fingers around her neck was watch.

“Why are you here?” asked Suki. “Are you a spy for the Fire Nation princess? That’s it, isn’t it? You locked me up in here and impersonated my girls and kept me trapped, but that’s not enough, you have to torment me too!”

“I’m a prisoner!” choked out Ty Lee.

Suki laughed, and her grip on Ty Lee’s throat tightened. “Don’t try screaming. The guards don’t care.” She put her mouth to Ty Lee’s ear. “Where. Do. The. Guards. Keep. The. Keys?” she hissed.

“I don’t know!” squeaked Ty Lee. “Please, let me go, I betrayed Azula, I’m not with her anymore!”

“Sure seemed like you were three days ago.” Ty Lee looked at Suki pleadingly, and she took her hand from Ty Lee’s throat, still blocking her path. “Fine. You get five minutes.”

Ty Lee gulped in as much air as she could. After she felt like she wasn’t going to pass out anymore, she started to talk.

“I- I’m not with Azula and Mai! I mean, I was, but then I helped Mai escape because I’m kind of secretly in love with her and I don’t know if she feels the same way but we did kiss this one time and I-” 

Suki glared at Ty Lee and she trailed off. “Sorry! Anyways, I chi-blocked Azula so Mai could escape with Zuko - he’s her boyfriend but you probably know him as that angry dude with a scar who you tried to escape with - and Sokka, but you know him too, so I don’t really know what to say now. But I think Azula is mad at me. Really mad.”

“It’s pretty easy to be mad at you.”

Ty Lee’s eyes watered, and Suki knew it had to be another trick, but by the Spirits, she looked like a puppy, and within seconds, Suki found herself inexplicably apologising.

Ty Lee sniffed and suddenly she’d collapsed into a pile on the floor and tears were streaming down her face. Suki stared, before eventually kneeling down and putting her hand on Ty Lee’s shoulder.

“Are… Are you okay?”

“Azula hates me…” sobbed Ty Lee. “She’s never going to forgive me… Azula never forgives…”

“Azula isn’t a good person.” pointed out Suki. “Maybe it’s a good thing she doesn’t like you anymore.”

This only prompted Ty Lee to cry harder. Suki sighed and wrapped her arms around Ty Lee. The other girl buried her head in Suki’s neck and wept.

“Tell me about Azula.”

“Oh… Azula…” said Ty Lee. “Azula’s amazing. She’s the smartest person I’ve ever met, and she knows how to control people so easily, and she’s just… she’s hard to describe.”

“Does she ever get angry?” asked Suki.

“I- I guess she does. Sometimes she shouts at everyone and banishes her servants and forces me and Mai to hurt people in front of her. I don’t like doing that. But it’s okay, because it’s Azula, and she gets to do what she wants.”

“That doesn’t sound like a very healthy friendship.”

“It’s… it’s not?”

Suki found herself compelled to hug Ty Lee again.

“Ty Lee.” said a male voice. A guard grabbed her by the arm and pulled her up. “Azula wants to see you.”

Ty Lee’s breath caught in her throat. “She does?”

“Come with me.”

“Don’t let her manipulate you again.” insisted Suki. “Don’t go with him.”

Ty Lee didn’t listen. Azula wanted her back. Azula wanted to see her. Azual wanted to hear what she had to say. Azula wanted her.

Suki watched as Ty Lee was led away by two guards to the highest room in the prison and didn’t even fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave kudos and a comment to tell me what you think or any theories you have, I appreciate it so much!


	3. Zuko Bonds With His Lesbian Girlfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko and Mai have an important conversation.

The cool morning air hit Zuko as he opened his eyes. He automatically reached for his sword, and instead found his hand grazing soft silk. His eyes snapped open, and he saw Mai curled up beside him, her red robe splayed out on the wicker floor. He sat up quickly. Sokka caught his eye and gave him a knowing smirk from the other side of the balloon. Zuko gave Sokka an awkward smile that he hoped was an adequate response.

Sokka winked. “Don’t worry, you can get all touchy-feely. It’s only me!”

Zuko briefly considered jumping off the moving balloon.

Sokka turned back to watching the fire, and Zuko looked outside. He had to admit, even after spending all this time on hot air balloons, the view was breathtaking. It was a clear, sunny day, and the sky was blindingly blue. Clouds sped by as the balloon slowly made its way to Zuko’s certain doom. He wished it would hurry up.

It was rare that Zuko woke up after the sun rose, but he’d barely closed his eyes the previous night. The change of environment must have been enough to send him to sleep, without any of the usual nightmares plaguing him. Zuko had almost forgotten what that felt like.

Mai woke shortly after. After a lot of stretching and yawning, she ran a brush through her mass of black hair a single time and declared she was ready for the day (or, in her words, ‘Okay, my will to live is gone but it’s been away for seven years so I think that’s fine, what are we doing today?’)

Zuko took over the fire from Sokka, who had been keeping an eye on it for hours. He added some more force to the fire, and it roared quietly in its burner. Silence stretched over the group. Last night, it had seemed like the three of them going on this trip together was fate. Now, it was just awkward.

Zuko could barely stand to look at Mai. He’d thought that when he rescued her from the Boiling Rock, they’d be happy. He’d be happy. She’d betrayed Azula for him, for Agni’s sake. But when they returned to the Air Temple, he found that she didn’t even want to talk to him. She left the room when he entered, and found ways to get out of every potential conversation. Then, Zuko started to think about Sokka in a certain way, and he couldn’t speak to Mai without being overwhelmed by guilt.

Had his attraction to her ever been real? He’d thought it had been. He told her she looked nice when she wore dresses, and held her hand in public and gave her gifts. He’d been a good boyfriend. He’d wanted to be with her. He’d felt something when they kissed… hadn’t he? 

Mai made him feel safe. She was the girl his father would have wanted him to end up with. When he was with Sokka, something else came over him. Something dangerous. He had no idea if it would feel any different if he kissed Sokka, but… 

He couldn’t think about that. 

Zuko wouldn’t let the allure of danger destroy his life again. He couldn’t allow himself to follow his treacherous wants. His impulses had gotten him exiled. They’d given him the scar that he was forced to confront every time he looked in a mirror. Zuko couldn’t let himself want anymore.

The balloon shook violently, and tore Zuko from his contemplation. Sokka ran up to the fire, whilst Mai grumbled and got up from where she’d been lying on the floor. Zuko pushed himself up and strode to Sokka, trying not to trip as the balloon tilted.

“What happened?” he asked.

Sokka pointed at the fire, which was tiny and spluttering. “I swear, it was fine a few minutes ago!”

“It’s my fault.” said Zuko. “I was supposed to be keeping an eye on it, I got distracted. We need to land and pick up fuel right now or we’ll crash.”

“When you said we’d need to stop in towns everyday I thought you were over exaggerating!” exclaimed Sokka. “Can’t you make the flame bigger with your firebending?”

Zuko crossed his arms. “I never over exaggerate.”

“I can see that now!”

“And for your information, I’m not a never-ending fire machine! Firebenders do get tired!”

The balloon tipped to the side again, and Zuko had to grip the edge in order to not slide down.

“Guys?” interrupted Mai. Zuko and Sokka turned to look at her. “I get that you have, like, unresolved sexual tension, but I think we should maybe focus on not dying.”

The balloon took another sudden dip. Zuko was relieved that Sokka didn’t have to see the look of terror in his eyes at Mai’s… joke. Zuko would have to think about the implications of that comment at another time.

“Your girlfriend is…” choked out Sokka when the balloon stopped shaking wildly. “Really something.”

“Yeah…” replied Zuko, feeling as if he’d hit his head. He shook himself. “I can see buildings. You need to land the balloon right now. And make sure it’s in a field!”

“I’m not stupid!” shouted Sokka. Mai, who seemed barely affected by their potential deaths, raised an eyebrow.

Sokka slowly let air out of the balloon, whilst Zuko sat in a corner of the balloon and questioned his existence. At least the weather was on their side - the lack of clouds in the sky meant it was easy to see where they were landing. Soon, the balloon set down in an empty field at the edge of the village.

“I’m so glad we didn’t die.” said Mai, sounding like she didn’t really believe it.

They agreed that Mai and Zuko would head into town, whilst Sokka stayed and looked after the balloon. They began the long walk in silence. Zuko tried to appreciate the scenery in the many fields they passed through, but he kept glancing at Mai. She didn’t respond.

Zuko prepared a speech in his head, apologising for how he’d treated her and promising to be a better boyfriend and a better man. If she didn’t take him back after that… Zuko didn’t know what he’d do.

By the time they reached the outskirts of town, Zuko had rehearsed the speech in his head a hundred times over. He knew that he had to do this now, or he’d never have the nerve.

Zuko stopped abruptly, and Mai sighed.

“What is it? We need to keep moving, Zuko, or we won’t get back until it’s dark.”

Zuko took a deep breath, and took Mai’s hands in his. She stared. “I don’t know how to say this and make it mean anything to you after everything I’ve done, but I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you since the Boiling Rock, and I’m sorry for leaving without telling you. You gave everything for me, and I’ve ignored you. That’s not what a good boyfriend should do, but I promise, if you just hear me out I’ll be better, I’ll-”

“Zuko.”

Zuko’s breath caught. “Did I say anything wrong? Because I swear, Mai, I’ll do anything you want if you just-”

Mai gently took Zuko’s hands from hers. She let go. “Zuko, you’re a great guy but… I’m gay.”

Zuko’s heart stopped. He stood, frozen, his hand hanging, unmoving, in mid-air. Mai looked at him expectantly. He thought she had said something, because her lips were moving, but all he heard was the rush of blood in his ears. In his head, thoughts rushed past, incoherent. 

Mai’s words echoed over and over until they blocked out everything else. I’m gay. I’m gay. I’m gay I’m gay I’m gay I’m gay I’m gay I’m-

No. This couldn’t be… No. This wasn’t real. He was going to wake up now. This wasn’t happening.

“Zuko?” repeated Mai. “Say something. I don’t know what your father told you, but it’s not wrong. I can love who I love.” She caught Zuko’s eye. “Please.”

Zuko’s heart pounded. He felt his eyes blur, and his palms grow clammy. He was aware of every part of his body, the world moving as if in slow motion.

Zuko brought his hand to his side shakily. 

“I think- I…” Zuko swallowed. “Me too.”

When Zuko said those words, an unbearable weight left him. He breathed slowly, his head spinning. It was an effort to not fall to his knees in the middle of that field.

“I think I’m gay, Mai.”

Mai drew in a sharp breath. “Oh.” she said. “That’s cool.”

Mai continued to walk down the path, and Zuko stared after her. Thoughts whirled through his head. His legs had turned to jelly and the sun was shining down on his back, but he didn’t even feel it. He’d told someone. Zuko had told someone. He’d told Mai, and she was okay with it, and she was gay too, and for the first time, Zuko’s feelings seemed real.

“Wait!” shouted Zuko.

Mai stopped. She turned around, and looked at Zuko. Her expression softened. She got closer to him and put a hand to his cheek. 

“Oh, Zuko.” she whispered, and wiped something wet from his face, and Zuko realised he was crying. Mai wrapped her arms around Zuko. He let himself be buried in her soft robes.

“Please don’t tell Sokka.” murmured Zuko. “Please let him think we’re still dating.” His voice cracked. “I’m sorry but I-”

“Don’t apologise.” said Mai. “I get it. I still couldn’t say it out loud after I kissed Ty Lee. It’s stupid to say sorry, because there’s nothing to say sorry for.”

Mai’s monotone voice and embrace soothed Zuko. He pulled away feeling calmer than he had for a long time. Wordlessly, they began to walk towards the town together.

“So,” said Mai. “Sokka, huh?”

***

When Mai and Zuko returned, Sokka jumped out of the balloon and began to rant almost incoherently.

“Hey guys! I’m so glad you’re back! I mean, I was so bored, at first I just made up a story in my head but that got boring too so I started to look at the inner mechanisms of the balloon and um…” Sokka showed his charcoal-covered hands guiltily. “I kind of took apart some of the balloon.”

Zuko took one look at Sokka and impulsively threw his arms around him. 

“Oh- uh- okay-” stuttered Sokka. “You hug now! That’s fine! That’s cool!

Zuko hugged Sokka harder and Mai watched, a smile creeping at the edge of her lips, until Zuko kissed her. She was the only one to see Sokka, almost imperceptibly, wince.

***

That night, Zuko tossed and turned, fully awake. Mai, who’d had to remind him they were dating so they should probably sleep next to each other, snoring loudly definitely didn’t help. Zuko had managed to sleep for an hour until he woke up gasping. It was always the same nightmare - his father during the Agni Kai. The torture he inflicted upon Zuko differed each time, except that it ended with Fire Lord Ozai giving him the mark that had haunted his face for three long years.

“Can’t sleep?” asked Sokka quietly. He was sitting on the other side, leaning against the edge of the balloon. “Me neither.”

Zuko moved to sit beside Sokka. “I thought you could go to sleep as soon as you close your eyes.”

“Usually, yeah. But I have nightmares.”

It was hard for Zuko to remember that others suffered through similar terrors every night. To him, his pain was unique, his to suffer alone.

“Me too.”

Sokka looked at Zuko sympathetically. “Wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

Sokka acknowledged him with a nod, and they sat in silence. Zuko stared at the night sky desperately, hyper-aware of the other boy’s hand on his knee. He prayed to any Spirit listening to free him from this nightmare. As always, the Spirits ignored Zuko’s pleas.

He felt his heart throbbing at his proximity to Sokka, and swallowed. Zuko was fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mai and Zuko are wlw/mlm solidarity and I love it for them.
> 
> As always, please leave kudos and a comment as I love to hear what people think!


	4. Zuko’s Self Esteem Gets A Serious Boost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko meets a surprising young woman from the Fire Nation, and Azula interrogates Ty Lee.

“Hey, Zuko!” said Sokka. He nudged Zuko’s arm. “Do firebenders ever have to recharge?”

“... What?”

“I mean, you guys summon fire from inside you, right? When you run out of fire, have you ever considered putting your hand into fire or something? To let it flow through you?”

Zuko continued looking at the many fire-themed weapons through the shop window.

“That sounds like a great way to lose an arm.”

Sokka rubbed his chin in an over exaggerated attempt at thoughtfulness. “So firebenders can be affected by fire!”

“It would be a pretty useless skill otherwise. Firebenders fight each other more than anyone else.”

Sokka shrugged. “True.”

“We do recharge in a way, but it’s more... spiritual.” said Zuko. “Uncle Iroh taught me to meditate when I run out of energy. It comes back slowly, sort of like waves.”

“That sounds really boring.”

Zuko laughed. “I used to hate meditating when I was younger. I just wanted to get my power back immediately so I could keep training. I guess I appreciate the balance more now.” Zuko’s expression hardened. “There’s a reason the Spirits have to keep firebenders’ power in check.”

Sokka didn’t reply to that.

Zuko pulled the hood of his black cloak over his face and trailed behind Sokka as he entered the shop. No one noticed Sokka as long as he wore Fire Nation clothes, but Zuko’s scar was far too recognisable. He’d soon discovered there were wanted posters with his face plastered all over town, and Ozai’s reward was enough to make any common criminal who stumbled upon him rich.

It had been a mutual decision to take Sokka with Zuko into town this time. They’d made it until midday before they began to run low on fuel, and Zuko insisted they land in the nearest Fire Nation town. Sokka was sure he knew the workings of the balloon well enough to buy the fuel on his own (in fact, he probably knew a lot more about them than Zuko himself) but he was too scared to go into town alone in case he was recognised by an observant citizen or soldier and shipped straight to the Fire Lord.

It was later that they discovered the town was full of shops selling weapons and armour, and got slightly sidetracked.

Sokka dumped the bag of fuel on the floor and stared longingly at an engraved sword.

“Don’t you already have a sword?”

“I’d never replace Boomerang or Space Sword!” exclaimed Sokka. He stroked his boomerang and sword, which were hanging from his belt, lovingly. “It’s like with women. You can still look!”

Granted, Zuko didn’t have much experience with the fairer sex, but he was fairly sure that Sokka was being extremely sexist. From the little he’d seen of Suki at the Boiling Rock, she’d have punched him by this point, and he knew for a fact that Katara wouldn’t hesitate either.

The man behind the counter, presumably the owner of the shop, made his way over to Zuko and Sokka. He seemed about to greet them when he saw the twin blades strapped to Zuko’s back and stared.

“Sir, the engravings on your sword sheaths are beautiful. Am I right to think they’re Dao swords?”

Zuko turned to the man abruptly. He’d always enjoyed discussing his swords, even as a child. They weren’t just simple weapons - they were masterpieces of craft. Swords such as Zuko’s took years of careful training, mastery of the art of melding to be made. He’d watched in awe back in the Fire Nation during duels as the men effortlessly moved their swords through the air as if they were weightless.

“You’re right. They’re my most prized possession.”

The man edged closer to gaze at the matching swords. Zuko took them from his back and removed the gold gilded sheaths to reveal the sleek shiny weapons underneath.

“May I have the privilege of examining them closer?”

Zuko smiled. It was rare to find someone who appreciated great craftsmanship in the way he did. In the midst of a raging war, they became tools of destruction in most people’s eyes. 

“Of course.”

Zuko handed the swords to the man gently. He was glad to see him treat them with the utmost respect. 

“Sir, these swords are incredibly rare. They seem to have been made by Master Piandao. How did you manage to come across swords from the hands of such a prestigious craftsman? I was under the impression he no longer made swords for even the Fire Lord.”

When the man said the name of the master who made Zuko’s sword, Sokka gasped. Zuko shot him a confused look.

“He doesn’t - anymore. I was privileged enough to… come into them after they were no longer of use to the banished Prince.”

In a strange way, what Zuko was saying was true. He wasn’t the Crown Prince anymore. At a point on his travels, he had become someone else entirely, and it had only become clear to him once he returned to the Fire Nation and found his old title, along with his old hopes and goals, no longer fit.

“You are extremely lucky, Sir.” said the man. “Many weapon smiths, myself included, would dream to be you. I can only imagine who you must be under that cloak to have access to that sort of wealth.”

Zuko tensed, and winced internally at his own recklessness. He’d told the man a story far too close to the truth in his excitement at meeting a like minded person. Stupid. 

“I think we need to leave now.” snapped Zuko, snatching the swords from the man and attaching them to his back once again. He grabbed Sokka by the arm and pulled him, protesting, towards the door.

“I wish we could have talked longer, stranger.”

Zuko glanced back at the shop longingly. All he wanted was to stay, wander among the glass cabinets and look closer at the hundreds of gorgeous weapons. The fear in the pit of his stomach stopped him.

He could have spent a lifetime there. Instead, he turned away from the shop’s owner and left, simply muttering “Me too.” under his breath, so quietly the other man didn’t hear.

As soon as they left the shop, Sokka began to rant.

“You know Master Piandao too? He trained me! It was just a few weeks ago, and he’s the one who helped make my sword and I can’t believe we both-”

Zuko let Sokka’s voice wash over him and block out thoughts of weapons shops and masters and all the incredible people Zuko could have met if he hadn’t been so close-minded. The people he was fighting this war to protect.

***

Ty Lee stared up at Azula from where she was bowing, her face so low her matted hair scraped the moldy, wet floor of the cell. The guards had held her down and forced her into this position before Azula arrived, although Ty Lee hadn’t needed any encouragement. She could still feel an ache in her lower back from where the guard has pressed.

Azula had a menacing grin plastered on her face. Every hair on her head was in place, her boots as flawless as ever. She managed to look impressive even in this dark prison cell. Ty Lee’s previous companion, the dirt on the wall, dimmed in comparison.

Ty Lee would have prayed to the Spirits, but she knew all too well that Azula controlled Azula, and Azula alone.

“Please, Azula.” began Ty Lee. “I didn’t mean to betray you, I just wanted to help Mai. I’m your loyal-”

Azula brought her foot down on Ty Lee’s stomach without warning. Ty Lee jerked back in pain.

“Quiet, bitch.”

Ty Lee whimpered.

“When did you and Mai start working with the Avatar?”

“W… what?” stammered Ty Lee.

Azula screamed in frustration. Ty Lee stared at the ground, trying to hold back tears. 

“Look at me, bitch!” shouted Azula. “How long have you and Mai been plotting against me?”

Ty Lee’s voice shook. “We didn’t- I’d never-”

Azula shot lighting at Ty Lee. She crawled out of the way, and it hit the patch of wall beside her, which singed.

“Tell me the truth!” 

Azula punched Ty Lee’s jaw. She curled into a ball, sobbing. Azula laughed. 

“So, that’s how it’s going to be, is it?” Azula drawled. She smiled. “That’s okay. I have plenty more of this ready.”

Azula’s hands crackled with blue lightning. She stalked closer, like a cat hunting its prey, and Ty Lee pushed herself further and further away. Within seconds, Azula had backed her into a wall. Ty Lee’s breath quickened, and Azula’s sadistic grin widened.

“That’s much better, isn’t it?”

All Ty Lee could do was nod weakly.

“It was you all along, wasn’t it? Ever since we were children? You brainwashed me into thinking you were on my side when you were working with him!”

“I don’t-” choked out Ty Lee. “I don’t think the Avatar was alive until-”

“Shut up!” exclaimed Azula, and shot another bolt of lightning in Ty Lee’s direction. 

Locks of Azula’s hair had come undone and were hanging in front of her gold eyes. She knelt down to Ty Lee’s level, hissing as the slime coating the floor touched her silk trousers. Ty Lee shook in anticipation.

“You should be scared.”

Azula grabbed Ty Lee’s arm and twisted it. Ty Lee cried out. Tears streamed down her face as she screamed until her throat was raw. All she felt was the pain, so overwhelming it blocked out everything else. She heard Azula’s voice, but couldn’t understand anything she was saying. Black spots appeared in Ty Lee’s vision and the pain, oh, the pain-

Azula let go, and Ty Lee fell to the ground, panting. She forced herself to look up just as Azula had reached the door.

“See you tomorrow for round two, Ty Lee.”

***

Sokka grinned. “It’s so cool that we both have swords from Master Piandao! I can’t believe he’d work for your father, though.”

“In the Fire Nation,” said Zuko. “Everyone who values their life works if the Fire Lord asks.”

Zuko and Sokka were strolling down the main street in the town, looking at the various shops as they passed. It was currently sunny, but there was a foreboding grey cloud fast approaching from the north. Zuko hoped it wouldn’t affect the speed at which the balloon travelled.

Sokka stopped to listen to a young woman speaking in the middle of the street. The woman’s bright jacket and short hair were clearly supposed to draw attention. She was saying something about revolution and corruption, and holding colourful pieces of paper. She’d gathered a small crowd, who were listening, enraptured, to her words.

Zuko didn’t bother to pay attention. He’d encountered enough so-called ‘radicals’ who claimed they had the power to bring about change, and disappeared before they could even leave their hometown. Everyone knew what happened to those who spoke out against Zuko’s father, and it wasn’t pretty.

When she finished speaking, she began to hand out leaflets to everyone who had been listening. Zuko had one shoved into his hand, and was about to throw it onto the street, before Sokka came running up to him, his eyes wide.

“What?” asked Zuko.

Sokka doubled over laughing at some joke Zuko was completely unaware of. “You weren’t listening?”

“I’ve seen these types before. There’s no point paying her attention, she’s gonna be locked up by evening.”

“You should read the leaflet.”

“Did you listen to anything I said? She’s not new or revolutionary, she’s just-”

“Zuko.” interrupted Sokka. “You should really read the leaflet.”

Purely to see what Sokka was so excited about, Zuko opened the leaflet, and froze.

That was his face. Zuko’s face was in a leaflet. The leaflet had a giant drawing of Zuko’s face. 

What the fuck?

“Why the next Fire Lord should be the banished Prince Zuko…” read Sokka, grinning. “Our secret saviour.”

Zuko gaped. “They can’t be- It can’t mean-”

Sokka put his hand on Zuko’s arm. “She was talking about you, just now. People want you to be Fire Lord, Zuko!”

Zuko’s breath caught in his throat. It wasn’t… he hadn’t thought about being Fire Lord for so long. Before his banishment, it was an inevitable part of his future. When he was searching for the Avatar, it had been a far-away dream, as out of reach as his honour. But he was a traitor now. His country hated him. He was fighting as a leading figure on the opposite side of the war, for Agni’s sake. Why in the name of the Spirits did this girl want him to be her Fire Lord?

“I can’t wait to tell Aang about this!” exclaimed Sokka. “He’s going to be so happy to hear you have support here and-”

Zuko stared in shock at the girl. “I’m going to talk to her.”

“That’s a great idea!” replied Sokka. “Just be careful, I’ll come with you in case-”

“Only me.” said Zuko.

He went up to the girl, ignoring Sokka’s shouting. She looked at him suspiciously. That was understandable - if she was speaking out against Ozai regularly, she had even more reason to be cautious of a strange man with a hood over his face than any normal citizen.

“Can we talk? Privately.”

The girl sighed. “Leave me alone. I have a boyfriend.”

Zuko lifted his hood for a second. She gasped.

“Prince Z-”

“Shhh!” hissed Zuko, and she immediately stopped talking. She pulled him into a dark alley.

“It’s really you?”

Zuko raised an eyebrow. “Does anyone else have this scar?”

“I’m Himari.” said the girl. “What are you doing here? This town is tiny, there’s no one important, I promise.”

“I’m heading to the Boiling Rock with my friend.” He pointed out Sokka in the crowd. “We’re going to break some people out. We needed fuel, and I heard you talking.”

Himari’s face lit up. “Oh. Wow.”

“What the leaflet said…” Zuko swallowed. “Do people actually want me to be Fire Lord?” 

Himari nodded vigorously. “There used to be more of us. We’d all make speeches in our towns and we were gaining popularity but… most of us are gone now.” She didn’t have to specify what had happened to the others. 

“I’m sorry.” said Zuko.

Himari put her hand on his shoulder. “People believe in you, Zuko. Tell your friends we believe in them too.”

Zuko was silent for a while. He knew the danger Himari would be in if he told her any more. The danger she was already putting herself in, for him.

“If they take you, wait until they’ve beaten you up a bit, then tell them you know where I am. Say we’re in the Southern Air Temple. They’ll let you go.”

Himari opened her mouth to thank Zuko, but he was already gone.

***

Blood was raining from the sky. Zuko could feel it, sliding down his sweat-soaked face. His father held his hands up, and more blood poured down. He laughed, and Zuko begged for mercy, but it was no use. Ozai kicked Zuko, and he slid to the other side of the arena helplessly. His father summoned the largest ball of fire he'd ever seen, and slowly strode towards a shaking Zuko.

Just as Ozai was about to deliver the final blow, Zuko was thrown against the side of the balloon, and his eyes flew open.

He was able to see the balloon hurtling to the ground for a second before he felt a great crash, and everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s what the kids call a cliffhanger! Sorry about the line where Sokka is sexist but don’t lie to yourself, he definitely would. 
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments, I appreciate it so much! There’s no update for a few days because I have school but feel free to send me asks on tumblr about the fic while you wait.


	5. Holy Shit Zuko Is Going To Die (Of Cuddles!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko is stranded, hurt, and alone. Sokka helps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: explicit descriptions of vomiting in this chapter.
> 
> I lied in the last chapter, you guys get a chapter today because I forgot I have today off school. Still not uploading for a few days after this though.

The first thing Zuko noticed was the wetness hitting his face. Then, the raging pain in his ankle. 

The freezing liquid dripped down his cheek and off his chin, and he could feel rough earth under his aching back, his robes heavy on his heaving chest. They clung to his damp skin.

What had happened? Where was he? And why was his head throbbing like the morning after he broke into his father’s liquor cabinet at thirteen?

In the name of Agni, where were Sokka and Mai?

Zuko forced his eyes open, and his vision immediately began to swim. Squinting through the pounding headache, he was able to see leaves, and hints of grey sky beyond the green canopy. He tried to move his head, and black spots overwhelmed his eyesight. He fell to the ground, his back making a cracking sound as he hit the soil.

The darkness at the edges of his vision pulled him in. Zuko was losing his grip on himself, fading into the black depths of nothingness. He dug his nails into his palms until he drew hot blood. He hissed in pain, but felt himself drawn back. As his uncle had taught him, pain was a tether to the physical world in the loss of all else.

Zuko shivered. The torrential rain had soaked through his robes, to his bare skin. His hair stuck to his forehead, and the trees loomed above him, leering. They shook and spun and cried tears of rain onto Zuko. Their brown trunks swayed back and forth as if in prayer.

Zuko tried to push himself up from his elbows, and he caught a glimpse of a forest before a wave of pain from his throbbing ankle overwhelmed him. It tore through his body. Zuko screamed and writhed in agony.

Agni, shit, fuck, fuck, it hurt, it hurt, it hurt so much, he just wanted it to stop, please, let it stop, fuck, fuck-

Zuko collapsed to the ground. The pain had ripped his senses apart until it was all there was, and his limbs flayed out on the muddy earth. His breath came in desperate pants. The trees seemed to be laughing at him.

Ignoring how his head spun when he did so, Zuko strained until his head turned to the side. Bile rose in his throat. 

Lying a few metres away was the wreckage of the hot air balloon. The fabric was torn and muddied, and the remains of the basket were scattered around the forest. Zuko swore under his breath. There was no sign of Sokka or Mai. 

If Zuko had ended up like this… there was no telling where Mai or Sokka could be, or if they were even breathing.

For the first time, Zuko noticed the weight on his right leg. Above his twisted ankle was a crushing pressure. He looked up, and would have thrown a fireball in anger if he could lift his arms. There was a giant fallen tree lying on his leg, preventing him from moving even an inch.

Zuko gritted his teeth. He was going to get up. He was going to find Mai and Sokka. He was going to get out of this Spirit-forsaken forest.

He had to.

Zuko took a deep breath, and closed his eyes in concentration. He tensed his arms, clenched his fists, and pushed up. He managed to lean on his elbows for a second, seeing the dense, green forest in its entirety, before the sickness overcame him and he crumbled to the ground. 

Zuko lay on his back, watching the leaves and sky swirl in his vision. He wondered if this was the end. If his entire life, everything that had happened, would come to this. If he’d be remembered as the traitor Prince, mourned by no one. 

He wondered if his friends would care when they found out he’d died. If Sokka would remember their little jokes, their game of table tennis, when they broke into the Boiling Rock. If he’d cry or simply move on with his life.

Zuko wished he’d had the nerve to kiss Sokka before it was too late.

In a final push, Zuko attempted to pull his leg from under the log. He managed to move it a little before the pain burst out. Sweat trickled down his forehead as he focused all the strength left in him on staying upright. 

Another wave of pain shot through Zuko, and he screamed. Tears ran freely down his cheeks, beyond his control. Zuko’s head swam and his ankle burned, and before he could process what he was doing, Zuko was lying on his side, vomiting. He tried to hold himself up with shaking arms, but it was no use. He collapsed onto the sick-covered earth.

He heaved again and again, each time believing it had to be the last. His throat grew raw and his belly aching, but still, he would feel the pain rip through him and vomit the contents of his stomach onto the forest floor.

Zuko lay there tiredly, every ounce of energy stolen from him. He couldn’t bear to do this again. Wasn’t it enough to kill him at sixteen? Did the Spirits also have to torture him as he waited for death to arrive?

He thought he heard a voice, calling his name. It must be a hallucination. No one was going to find him now.

“Zuko!” called the faraway voice. “Zuko, where are you?”

The noise made Zuko’s head pound. Could hallucinations do that? He didn’t care anymore.

“Zuko!”

The voice sounded like Sokka. The Spirits were dangling hope before his very eyes. 

“Zuko, hang on, I’m going to find you!”

Zuko wasn’t going to fall for this. He wouldn’t let himself.

“Zuko, please, if you’re there, say something!”

In a moment of desperation, Zuko cried out. It was the only sound he could make.

The voice stopped calling.

Zuko went back to quietly slipping away.

Then, the voice shouted “Zuko!” It sounded closer this time. It sounded more desperate.

Zuko was too tired to care.

He let his heavy eyes close.

He was just going to rest. Just for a little bit.

“Tui and La, Zuko!” 

The voice sounded like it was right beside him. Had the Spirits come to collect his soul?

“No, no, no, no!” 

The voice was coming from above Zuko. He could feel warm breath on his face. Did the Spirits breathe?

“No, Zuko, don’t slip away from me!” The voice cracked slightly. “Look at me, okay, look at me? It’s all going to be okay, I just need you to open your eyes and stay with me, Zuko, okay? Listen to my voice.”

Zuko did. He had a very nice voice.

It reminded Zuko of someone. He couldn’t remember who. He couldn’t remember much, anymore.

“Zuko, please!” begged the voice. Zuko felt something wet fall on his cheek, and he didn’t think it was raining. “Hang on! Help is coming, I just need you to-”

The voice didn’t sound like a Spirit. It didn’t say things a Spirit would, either.

Zuko dragged his arms to his sides. It hurt. The voice encouraged him, saying strange things like “Yes! You can do this!” and “Just a bit more!” He used his back muscles to push himself up into a sitting position.

As soon as Zuko stopped moving, his stomach heaved and he was vomiting onto the mud and the voice exclaimed “Zuko!” and then strong arms were holding him up and someone was stroking his hair and whispering into his ear. 

Zuko’s eyes were open now, and he could see it was Sokka kneeling beside him, rubbing his back, his cheeks stained with tears. That was good. Sokka was good.

Zuko vomited again, and Sokka stayed, his hand resting on Zuko’s arm. Eventually, there was nothing left in his stomach and Zuko was dry heaving onto the ground, but Sokka kept talking to him quietly and holding his hand.

Zuko could see the sun was going down. There were dark clouds in the sky. It was going to rain. It had been raining before. 

Zuko hadn’t vomited for a while. He’d been here for a while. Sokka had been here for a while, too.

Zuko was tired. His head was on Sokka’s shoulder, and he thought he could feel Sokka’s hand around his back.

“You said something about help?” croaked out Zuko.

Sokka’s face lit up. That was the first thing Zuko had said. He’d forgotten he hadn’t said anything.

“Me and Mai crashed together, fifteen minutes away from here. We both got off with a few scratches.” Zuko noticed there were angry red marks on Sokka’s face and down each of his arms. “I told her to find the nearest village and get help. She won’t be long.”

“What are we going to do about the balloon?” asked Zuko. “It’s torn to pieces.”

Sokka sighed. “Mai said we shouldn’t give up, and I agree. I’m not doing that now.” He looked so downcast Zuko edged closer, so their shoulders were touching. “Maybe you were right, Zuko. We shouldn’t have gone on this trip.”

“Don’t say that.” said Zuko. His voice was raw, and Sokka handed him a flask of water, which he finished immediately. “You were determined to rescue Suki, you can’t give up on her now. She’s your girlfriend.”

“Thanks, but me and Suki aren’t… we’re not dating.” Sokka grinned. “I wish we were. Can you imagine? We’re just friends, though.”

Zuko suspected this information would mean a lot more to him when he wasn’t leaning against Sokka, half-dead, in the middle of a forest.

Sokka stared into the black night sky, the bright moon illuminating his face.

“It’s kinda pretty, you know? Even when you’ve known her in human girl form.”

Zuko didn’t respond, only gazed up in awe. He hadn’t looked this closely at the sky since he went stargazing with his mother as a child. He remembered that night clearly - they’d snuck into the palace gardens and laid on a blanket, watching the bright stars through her telescope. Ozai had been mad at them afterwards, but it was worth it.

“I’m really glad I found you.” said Sokka. “I mean, obviously, it would have been bad if you died but… I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You’ve only known me for two weeks.” Zuko looked away guiltily. “Well, since I’ve not been trying to kill you.”

“Who else would I relentlessly annoy with my brilliant jokes about jerkbending?” Sokka laughed to himself. “Jerkbending…”

“Thank you, Sokka. That means more to me than you realise.”

“I knew you liked the jerkbending joke!”

“Not the…” Zuko trailed off. He wasn’t even going to try with that poor excuse of a joke.

He was ignoring the pain in his ankle, but it was growing worse. By now, he could barely sit upright without feeling dizzy. He hoped it wasn’t a sign it was broken.

Zuko grit his teeth and hissed.

“Your foot’s getting worse.” It wasn’t a question.

“I’m fine.” snapped Zuko.

“I looked at it when I first saw you. It’s all red and swollen, and bent out of place. The tree’s too big to move, or we would have got out of here hours ago.”

Zuko’s ankle stung, and he grunted. Sokka squeezed his hand. Zuko’s heart skipped a beat.

At that moment, it started to rain.

It wasn’t too bad at first - just a light splatter on their faces, but soon, the rain was pouring down, soaking their thin clothes and covering their bare skin. Zuko was already cold from being sick, and the wetness soaking through his clothes only made it so much worse.

Zuko withdrew into himself, hugging his arms to his chest. As more freezing rain spilled over him, he began to shiver uncontrollably. 

Without saying a word, Sokka pulled Zuko close, his arm curled around Zuko’s waist, and held him. He brought Zuko’s head to his chest and clasped Zuko so close he could hear Sokka’s heartbeat. The warmth of the other boy’s body heated Zuko. He nearly couldn’t feel the rain from beyond where he lay on Sokka’s shoulder, pressed together. 

“I don’t want to die anymore.” whispered Zuko.

Sokka’s hand brushed Zuko’s, and he grabbed it. 

“What do you mean?”

“When I was fourteen, the ship me and my uncle were travelling in sank.” began Zuko. 

Sokka listened intently, not taking his eyes off the other boy. 

“I was stranded on a random beach, away from Uncle. I had no food or water, and I’d hit my head really hard. I remember wishing I could die right then, instead of living in a world where my father had exiled me.” 

Sokka squeezed Zuko’s hand again. 

“But right now, when you found me and I thought I was dying… I wanted to live, Sokka.”

When Zuko said those words, he felt something warm in his stomach. Something he hadn’t felt in a long time. 

Sokka smiled. “I’m just that amazing, right?”

A joke was exactly what Zuko needed at that moment. Tired and sick and possibly concussed, feeling the most understood as he ever had, as if he’d bared his soul to the Water Tribe boy, Zuko nestled further into Sokka’s arms.

In the middle of the dark forest, while the rain hit the dirt floor and animals scurried around the woods, inexplicably, in Sokka’s snug embrace, Zuko felt safe.

***

Mai found them an hour later, still wrapped around each other. She only told them to get off each other and follow her. She’d brought a farmer, who’d agreed to let them stay with him and his wife, and his ostrich horse. Together, Sokka, Mai and the farmer managed to lift the tree off Zuko’s leg and he hobbled, propped up between Mai and Sokka, until they reached the edge of the forest. They hoisted Zuko onto the back of the horse, and from there it was a short journey.

Zuko found himself nearly drifting off to sleep multiple times on the horse, which was a new experience for him, and Sokka had to jab him with his elbow to wake him up when they got to the farmhouse.

Apparently, he’d fallen asleep at the kitchen table, because he woke when the farmer’s wife served him and Sokka hot soup, and had no memory of entering the house.

Mai and the couple had already gone to bed, so it was just Zuko and Sokka at the table. It was well past midnight, but Zuko’s attention was focused on the delicious smelling bowl in front of him.

Sokka slurped up his soup in a few fast gulps. “What a day, huh?”

“Yeah.” said Zuko. He caught Sokka’s eye across the table. “Thank you. For everything.”

For once, Sokka didn’t make a quip. He took Zuko’s hand under the counter and Zuko knew that he hadn’t been alone in what he felt in the forest. 

Sokka leaned slightly closer, almost as if he was going to… Zuko’s breath caught. Instead, Sokka stopped a few metres before Zuko’s face and gazed into his eyes. 

Zuko took another sip of his soup, and the moment was broken. They sat in silence, and when Zuko had finished, he said an awkward goodbye and went upstairs.

Sokka stared after Zuko as he left, his eyes wide, as if seeing him for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has Sokka finally realised his feelings...?
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed because I was really proud of this one! Please leave a comment to tell me what you thought.


	6. Zuko Has A Run In With Alcohol (And The Law)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko, Mai and Sokka make a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Physical violence and scars, referenced sexual assault, underage drinking, referenced child abuse, periods reference.

Suki was worried about Ty Lee.

When the other girl had been led away, Suki was left with a lingering feeling of sadness. She knew that Ty Lee was the reason she was in this prison, that it was Ty Lee’s fault she was separated from her beloved girls. For the Spirits' sakes, she’d only spoken to Ty Lee out of pettiness.

Yet another part of her, the part closer to her heart, felt a sorrow for this seemingly-innocent young girl. Perhaps their entire conversation had been an act, a ploy for Suki’s sympathy. But maybe it wasn’t. Maybe Ty Lee was an incredibly talented woman who’d been pulled into something much bigger than her, and was now at the mercy of Azula.

Ty Lee didn’t come back for dinner that day.

Suki waited.

She didn’t see Ty Lee the next day, or the day after that. Soon, it had been four days of relentless monotony and Ty Lee was still missing. 

The prisoners stood to order when asked, and tried to ignore Azula as she and her entourage strutted around the prison. Suki didn’t miss the fact that when she returned from the highest tower on the second day, her long nails were dotted with blood.

By the afternoon of the fourth day, Suki decided she needed to do something. If only for the sake of her conscience.

“Do you know where they’re keeping that young girl who betrayed the Princess?”

The beefy prisoner sitting beside Suki in the mess hall grunted in response.

The prison was designed to hold as many prisoners as possible, the giant mess hall made of metal, so to hold any particularly brave earthbenders (as far as Suki knew, the rumours about Toph being able to metalbend were just rumours) and each wall was lined with armed guards. Even the non-bending guards here could crush most rebellions with a single punch. 

Others underestimated them, but Suki knew better than anyone the power of a non-bender, and the Fire Nation militia had the most brutal training regiment of all. 

However, meal times also meant the guards were almost entirely confined to one part of the prison. And Suki was going to take advantage of that.

She went up to a nearby guard, making sure to stand as far away as possible. It wasn’t as if more than a few guards hadn’t tried to get their way with her. They’d all ended up with broken noses.

This one looked young, less sure. That was good.

“Sir, could I leave to use the bathroom?”

The man’s face immediately flushed. “Ma’am, you know the rules. No leaving the mess hall.”

“But I’m-” Suki leaned closer to whisper in his ear. “It’s my… time of the month.”

The guard spluttered and blushed, clearly unsure of what to do. 

“Come on.” said Suki. She grinned. “What could I do? After all, I’m just a woman.”

The guard sighed. “Fine. But I’m accompanying you, and I’ll be watching the door.”

He took Suki by the arm and led her towards the mess hall door. As they walked down the line of guards, a few winked at the guard and Suki heard a whispered comment about ‘Securing the goods.’ She tried not to be sick.

They headed to the toilets, on the other side of the prison building, in silence. Suki could feel the man’s eyes glued to her anytime she swung her arms or moved her head. She waited until they were close to the bathrooms, and the guard seemed to have accepted that Suki wasn’t trying to escape, to land a sucker punch to his gut.

The man stumbled backwards, and opened his mouth to call for help. Before any noise could get out, Suki pulled out the duct tape she’d had to stab three men to acquire (really, the lengths a girl had to go to in order to secure illegal resources in prison these days were so extreme) and covered the man’s mouth.

She landed another hit to his forehead, and he collapsed to the floor. He seemed to be knocked out, at least for now. Suki tied his hands together, and left him lying, blood pouring from his nose, on the cool steel floor.

She’d be long gone by the time anyone noticed he’d been away for more time than it took to… Suki didn’t want to think about what the other guards thought he was doing to her.

After that, it wasn’t hard to creep up the staircase to the top of the prison tower. Suki’s Kyoshi Warrior training had taught her the importance of stealth.

The single guard at the steel door to Ty Lee’s cell barely reacted when he saw Suki, which set off red flags in Suki’s head. She would have thought the prisoner of the Princess of the Fire Nation, who could chi-block any bender with a touch, would be guarded with far more force.

“Back to the mess hall.” said the guard, almost tiredly. 

Suki drew a sharpened stick from her trouser pocket, and the man’s eyes widened. He backed away.

“Is this where you’re keeping Ty Lee?”

“You can have her!”

Suki froze. 

“... What?”

This was a trap. An elaborate trap. It had to be.

The guard nodded his head vigorously. “The Princess has been in her room for days! She’s made no effort to visit the girl and won’t let anyone in!”

That was... interesting. Azula was having some sort of breakdown? Suki tucked away that information for if she came across the Avatar or any of his friends again.

“We don’t know what to do with her,” continued the guard “But she’s not a threat anymore!”

Suki’s stomach turned. Ty Lee, no longer a threat? Until a week ago, she’d been Azula’s most powerful weapon.

“Open the cell.” ordered Suki.

The guard obeyed, and Suki entered.

Suki took one step in and was hit by an overwhelming stench of human excrement. The cell was dimly lit, and the walls were stained with mould and something darker. A thick liquid seeped into her prison issue shoes.

It took a few seconds to spot the bundle of dirty clothes in the corner. She approached cautiously, and when she glanced down, bile rose in her throat.

Ty Lee was curled against the wall, not responding. She had red scratches down her face, and her clothes were ripped - burned? - and stained with blood. Dark scorch marks surrounded Ty Lee on the floor.

Suki knelt down and gently touched Ty Lee’s shoulder. The girl’s arm shot out. She gripped Suki’s arm with surprising strength. 

“Mai?” whispered Ty Lee, her voice cracking.

Suki shook her head. She could feel burns and raw skin all over Ty Lee’s hand. She wished it surprised her that a human being could do this to another human, but after all she’d seen, she didn’t believe the Fire Nation elite were anything resembling people.

“It’s Suki.” said Suki. She tried to keep her voice low, reassuring. It was hard to keep out the disgust, at Azula and her entire Spirits forsaken family.

“Where am I?”

“You’re in prison. You’re going to be okay. I’m going to get you out of here, Ty Lee.”

Suki put a hand around Ty Lee and helped the shaking girl up. She supported her as they went through the door, and down the stairs of the tower, to Suki’s cell.

“I don’t want to be friends with Azula anymore.” said Ty Lee, nearly in a whisper into Suki’s ear.

Suki didn’t know what to say that would help the other girl.

“I’m sorry, Ty Lee.”

Ty Lee’s eyes filled with unshed tears, and Suki took her hand. 

She didn’t let go.

***

“Don’t lie to yourselves.” said Mai. “There’s no way we can break into the Boiling Rock now.”

Zuko massaged his temple. “I know that. Are you saying we should give up?

Zuko, Sokka and Mai were crowded around a table in the kitchen of the farmhouse they’d been staying in for the last three days. Zuko had managed to walk on his own without the cane, due to the intense physical training he’d been doing every day, and it lay abandoned in the corner.

“We can’t give up now!” exclaimed Sokka. “I know we need a solid plan, I’m the plan guy, but there’s got to be a way!”

Mai rolled her eyes.

“I never said we should give up. I said that we couldn’t break in.”

Zuko leaned closer, his elbows resting on the table.

“Is it that hard to figure out? We need to get arrested.”

***

Zuko stared into the crackling orange fire. He threw in another log, and it roared. There was something alluring about it, combined with the cool night air and the pitch black sky, and the knowledge that in a few hours the fate of Zuko would be once again in the hands of his father.

There was a part of him that hoped the farmer would never come back from the local village with Fire Nation soldiers, and another part that wished he would hurry up.

Mai pulled a bottle out of her robes. It was plum wine, stolen from the farmer’s wife. Zuko gave her a disapproving look, and she shrugged.

“I thought we could have some fun before we die. At least it will take the edge off things.”

Before Zuko could point out the many flaws in Mai’s idea, Sokka had taken the bottle and was chugging down gulps of wine. He handed it back to Mai, and Zuko saw his lips were stained purple. Zuko couldn’t stop himself laughing at an increasingly confused Sokka.

Mai and Zuko were sharing a single log in front of the campfire Zuko had made, the night just warm enough that they didn’t freeze. Sokka had his own log on the other side and was leaning back, already slowed by the alcohol.

Mai stood up abruptly.

“I wrote this poem about the time we’ve spent together. It doesn’t matter if you like it or not.”

She drew out a piece of crumpled paper.

“Death! Darkness! The end! Hopelessness!”

Mai continued to shout. At some point, Zuko found himself drinking more and more of the wine. Across the campfire, Sokka was yawning. Mai either didn’t notice or didn’t care.

“Treachery! Lies! Betrayal!”

Zuko wondered if this was a poem or a thinly veiled plot to kill him of boredom.

“Gloom! Shadow! Dusk!”

Zuko moved to sit beside Sokka. He whispered his previous thought to Sokka, who laughed slightly more than was necessary.

“Sin! Evil! Corruption!”

Crickets chirped in the distance.

“Homicide! Manslaughter! Murder!”

Zuko couldn’t stop himself putting his head in his hands.

“Bloodshed!” continued Mai. “M-”

“Please stop!” exclaimed Sokka. Mai looked at him, expressionless. Sokka swayed in his seat. “It was very inspirational but I think it could…”

“He means it was terrible.” said Zuko. The words spilled out before he realised what he was saying. Maybe he’d had more plum wine than he’d thought.

“Wow, I’m so offended.” Zuko rushed to apologise, and Mai rolled her eyes. “I don’t care. It’s performance art. It’s supposed to make you feel something.”

Zuko raised an eyebrow. “Anything?”

Sokka laughed. “That poem sure made me feel something. I don’t know what it is, though.”

Mai took another gulp of wine. 

“This might help.”

Sokka took that as an incentive to chug down wine, and shoved it at Zuko. He had one sip, but it didn’t feel like enough, and then he was drinking more and more whilst Mai and Sokka cheered him on.

The world was more than slightly blurry.

“One time, when I was a kid, I stole my father’s wine. I vomited everywhere the next day, all over the palace furniture.”

“I remember that!” exclaimed Mai.

“You do?” asked Zuko, mildly horrified.

“Azula told me and Ty Lee how stupid her big brother was and how she had to play outside now.”

Sokka grinned. “Little you sounds so adorable.”

“I was innocent.”

“What could you have been, a murderer?” Sokka laughed far too hard. “Did you think you were going to be thrown in the dungeons?”

Zuko didn’t find it funny.

Even in her intoxicated state, Mai could realise when Sokka was going too far. She shot him a warning look, but he was too drunk to notice. 

“My father starved me for two days.”

Mai drew in a sharp breath. Sokka gasped.

“Tui and La, Zuko, that’s horrible!”

“Please don’t-”

Sokka, far beyond any common sense, wrapped his arms around Zuko from behind and tucked his face on Zuko’s shoulder. 

“Do you want a cuddle?”

Zuko tensed. His mouth had dried out,

“Aw, it’s okay, it’s just me! You know, back in the Water Tribe, I’m kind of a prince.”

“I’ve seen the Water Tribe.” 

Sokka pouted.

Zuko glanced around desperately for any escape, and saw that Mai had abandoned him.

“Your hair is very soft!”

Agni, Sokka was petting his hair. Zuko tried to peel the other boy off him, and Sokka only clung tighter.

“My mum died too.” murmured Sokka. Zuko caught Sokka’s eye, and he leaned closer. “Everyone thinks I don’t care, because Katara’s the one with the necklace and she always talks about her and I don’t even remember and I’m a boy so I’m supposed to be strong, and I’m the fun guy who doesn’t care about anything, but I do care. I miss her a lot, Zuko.”

“No one ever thought you don’t. You just show your grief differently.”

Sokka slung an arm around Zuko’s waist. “I care a lot about you, too.”

“I think that’s different.”

Sokka smiled mischievously and leaned close so their lips brushed. “Oh, it’s very different.”

Zuko’s head spun. Perhaps it was the wine, or the proximity to Sokka, or even the night air, but he pressed his lips against Sokka’s.

He was kissing Sokka.

It was wet, and sloppy, and there was too much tongue, and Sokka’s breath tasted of plum wine, but it felt so different to when he’d kissed Mai and Jin. It felt electric.

The world stopped as Zuko pushed his mouth against Sokka’s and he was pressing kisses against Sokka’s jawline, his chin, the soft skin at the nape of his neck.

It took Zuko a few seconds to process that Sokka had pushed him away.

Sokka stood up, his face frozen in a mask of shock.

“What is it?” asked Zuko. His voice was raw.

“You have a girlfriend! I like your girlfriend! I can’t be that guy, I’m never going to be that guy, I have to go-”

“Wait!” shouted Zuko.

Sokka continued to run towards the farmhouse. Zuko tried to get up to follow him, and he was overwhelmed by dizziness. He gagged.

“It was never real, I’m not dating Mai, it was a lie, I-”

Sokka was already gone.

Zuko turned, and found himself face to face with three Fire Nation soldiers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the kudos and hits! This is my most popular fic now and it means so much to me that people are enjoying it.


	7. Zuko’s Prison Break Two: Electric Boogaloo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko, Mai, and Sokka arrive at the Boiling Rock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Someone touches Zuko’s scar non-consentually.
> 
> I made a playlist for this fic! I hope you enjoy listening whilst you read this chapter.
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2i09riHuuWG5qOYadq7IzO?si=1IjW9NjES7CJPCfBU7RBNQ

The inside of the prison wagon was dim, barely any light able to enter from the barred windows. Besides, the sun had not risen yet, and the only light streaming in was from the moon’s bright face. Zuko had been sitting there, in handcuffs and wedged in-between Mai and Sokka for an hour or so. In the uncomfortable silence filling the wagon, it felt a lot longer.

The moonlight illuminated Sokka’s features. He was leaning on his elbows, staring dejectedly onto the metal floor, strands of hair coming undone from his messy wolf tail. The lump in Zuko’s throat grew.

The arrest wasn’t supposed to happen like this. They were supposed to go into the Boiling Rock together, as a team. Not disheartened and unable to carry a single conversation.

It was Mai’s fault. She shouldn’t have brought the plum wine. Zuko shouldn’t have drunk it. He shouldn’t have kissed Sokka, he shouldn’t have told Sokka he was dating Mai, he shouldn’t have even gone on this trip in the first place.

Who was he kidding? This mess was up to Zuko and Zuko alone. He’d gone and fucked everything up, like he always did. Sokka’s… friendship had always been too good to last, in the theatrical tragedy that was Zuko’s existence.

Uncle would have said that Zuko was simply being an over dramatic teenager, and he should have some calming tea. But Uncle wasn’t there, and Zuko was fairly sure he couldn’t ask the Fire Nation soldiers for a cup of jasmine tea.

This mess was Zuko’s to deal with by himself.

“So,” said Mai, breaking the silence. She must have picked up on the tension between Zuko and Sokka, but chose to ignore it. “I can’t believe that farmer would report us.”

Zuko could tell what she was doing; starting a conversation to quench any doubts the soldier watching them on the other side of the carriage might have. He was too exhausted to bother to contribute.

“Sure was disappointing.” replied Sokka half-heartedly. His tone sharpened, and he looked directly at Zuko. “It’s just too bad when someone you think you know betrays your trust, right, Mai?”

That jab landed where it hurt.

“Maybe the farmer just didn’t understand what he was doing when he reported us.” snapped Zuko.

“I really don’t think-” Mai glanced at Sokka and Zuko, who were glaring at each other. “Is there something I’m missing here?”

Sokka shot Zuko a sadistic grin. 

He wanted Zuko to tell Mai he’d cheated on her. Mai, the lesbian, who hadn’t been dating Zuko since they rescued her, and was probably in a relationship with Ty Lee. And now Sokka hated him.

Zuko resisted the urge to bury his head in his hands. How had his love life gone from nonexistent to so incredibly complicated in a week?

He shook his head at Mai’s question. Sokka’s expression hardened and he glanced away from Zuko, as if he couldn’t bear to look at him. 

Zuko’s head hurt. It had been so much easier when his only friend had been his sixty year old uncle.

As Sokka gazed with vague menace at Zuko, something inside him snapped. He edged closer.

“You don’t understand the whole story. Hear me out, I swear, I was never-”

Sokka pushed Zuko violently away. As he slammed into Mai’s side, his breath caught in his throat.

“Leave me alone.” spat Sokka. He caught Zuko’s eyes, his cold and lifeless. His expression contained an indescribable, chilling hatred. “Let’s just get this over with, and we never have to talk again.”

Zuko hissed. He felt something hot and fierce rising in his chest. Something he hadn’t felt since he joined the Avatar; anger. Pure, undistilled anger, the unrepentant kind that had fueled him during those years spent on his desperate search. How dare Sokka treat him this way? How dare Sokka throw him away like he was nothing, not even listening to his explanation?

Before Zuko realised it, he had summoned roaring orange flames in both of his hands.

The fire caught the edge of Mai’s robes. She hit it with her sleeve until it went out, and glared at Zuko. Sokka’s eyes were wide in horror. It had been an accident, he knew what it looked like but he hadn’t meant to-

Zuko didn’t have to apologise to anyone. Especially not Sokka. He clenched his fists, and the fire grew larger, louder, and the anger in his chest overwhelmed him. 

The soldier who’d been watching them in silence grabbed a bucket of water and threw it over Zuko’s hands. 

The fire immediately went out, and the soldier grabbed Zuko by the arms, tightening his handcuffs. He threw open the door and led Zuko out of the wagon. The cold night air hit him like a sucker punch. The soldier muttered something to the other soldier, who was riding the ostrich horse pulling the wagon, about Zuko “causing too much trouble” and needing to be “separated from the others.”

The soldier stood behind Zuko as they followed the wagon. It didn’t take long for Zuko’s legs to begin to ache, but he ignored it. He’d endured far worse.

The wagon moved quickly, and Zuko had to walk at a brisk pace to keep up. This was his punishment for his loss of control. The only friendly company was Yue, and even she was beginning to disappear as dawn neared. They passed through forests and over streams and empty fields - so many Spirit-forsaken fields - and still Zuko walked. 

The anger festered in the pit of his stomach. What had he done to deserve this? Agni, why was he so stupid? Had the Spirits given up on him?

He knew the exact moment his soldier/guard became restless. The sun was rising, its rays not yet strong enough to overwhelm the biting cold of the early morning. His stomach had been rumbling for the past hour, although he knew asking for food would be pointless. 

Abruptly, the man caught up to Zuko and touched his scar.

Zuko jerked away. 

“What in Agni’s name do you think you’re doing?” 

The soldier laughed. “Don’t be so touchy, Prince.” He said the word ‘Prince’ in a way that made Zuko’s blood boil. “How did you get it, anyway? Palace training accident?”

Zuko growled. He tried to force down the bile that rose in his throat at the man touching his scar.

The soldier, encouraged by Zuko’s discomfort, grinned. “Royal infighting?”

He noticed the way Zuko twitched when he said that.

“I knew it! Were you and your sister fighting for Daddy’s affection?” Zuko clenched his fists so hard his nails dug into his palm. “Ooh, I know! Was it the Fire Lord himself?” Sweat trickled down Zuko’s forehead. “Was he not happy with you? Was it because you helped the Avatar? Were you too much of a pussy for him?”

“Shut up!” yelled Zuko.

His shout echoed around the rolling green field. The soldier seemed taken off guard, but continued.

“Aw, did I hit a soft spot? Does Daddy not like you much? Does he-”

Zuko threw a fireball at the soldier. The man dodged just in time and, panting, called for help. His stomach churning, Zuko ran across the field.

The wind fought against him, pummeling his eyes, and a few lone tears fell down his cheeks, beyond his control. The field seemed to never end, but he kept running, the weight in his stomach making him never slow. Thoughts bombarded him, thoughts of failure and Sokka and Agni Kais and kisses and the plan and how he was ruining everything.

Zuko didn’t stop.

The field kept rolling past. His knees came close to buckling but he forced them to run. The one thought that he could grasp was this; whatever he did, he couldn’t give up.

The sun was so blindingly bright he could barely see where he was going. He wished for Yue and her calm, peaceful light. He wished for anything but this. 

Zuko was so caught up in the light that he didn’t notice he’d tripped and fallen to the soft grass.

It took only a few minutes for the wagon to catch up. The soldier forced him up and he kept walking beside the wagon, getting closer and closer with every step to his sister, and the Fire Nation’s most unbreachable prison.

The anger lay dormant, waiting, inside him. Now, he just knew he needed to use it.

***

The plan was simple; Mai would find where they kept the war balloons and secure one for their escape, whilst Sokka would get Suki and Ty Lee, and Zuko would distract the guards long enough for them to get away. No matter the current internal conflict, they would follow the plan step-by-step.

Nevertheless, Zuko briefly considered running when he saw the massive prison gates.

They were a lot more menacing from the wagon. In the sky, from the safety of Sokka’s war balloon, they had seemed tiny and easily breachable. On the ground, Zuko could see they swept high up, almost beyond his line of sight, and were guarded by at least twenty fully armed soldiers.

Zuko remembered how he and Sokka had nearly crashed into the lake of boiling water for which the Boiling Rock had its name the last time they were here. He and Sokka had barely trusted each other, let alone considered the other a friend. They’d made so much progress since, yet it felt like their relationship was even more strained.

Sokka gulped, whilst Mai inspected her nails nonchalantly. This was what they had come all this way for. They were in the endgame.

They complied when the soldiers led them onto a gondola and they were lined up with a few other new prisoners. It was strange that it was not mentioned that Zuko was the Prince, or that Sokka had been travelling with the Avatar, as that would surely make them higher priority prisoners, but Zuko let it slide.

After being briefed by the Warden, who didn’t even acknowledge Sokka and Zuko, despite the fact they had previously kidnapped him, they were let free in the busy courtyard. They whispered their agreement to the final plan and strained goodbyes.

“Good luck, I guess.” said Mai. “Not like it will help.” She looked at Sokka, her expression showing hints of emotion for once. She drew her glinting knives. “If you don’t manage to get Ty Lee, I will cut you and your Suki into tiny pieces.” 

Sokka nodded, visibly scared. “Noted!” He turned to Zuko. “Bye. I hope you don’t die... I think.”

“You don’t need luck. You just need skill.” Zuko grimaced. “If we’re good enough, we’ll get out alive. If not…”

No one needed to point out what would happen if they failed.

Mai was the first to walk away. Sokka followed, and soon Zuko was left alone in the courtyard. He entered the cell block through an open door as casually as possible, scanning the room for guards. There were none.

He was heading to the guard’s office on the next floor when he saw Azula.

She was leaning against the wall, her arms crossed. She was grinning.

Zuko froze.

“How stupid do you think I am?” drawled Azula. She stalked closer. “I knew you and your little friends let yourselves be arrested to find that Kyoshi girl. I let you in.”

Zuko opened his mouth to speak, and found no words could come out.

“I’ve already had my guards arrest the Water Tribe boy. They’ll find that traitor Mai too, I’m sure of it.” Azula put a manicured hand on Zuko’s shoulder. “Come with me, Zuzu. It’s over.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter brought to you by so much angst, oh my god look at all the angst. Don’t worry, it gets better... after it gets a lot worse.

**Author's Note:**

> I track the tag #tpiiahob on tumblr for this fic so feel free to post about it there!
> 
> My tumblr blog is @wlwalina and I’m always happy to receive asks about my fics.


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